I think its funny how, as im sitting here at 2am staring at the ceiling, every single memory suddenly plays again at the back of my head. some are sweet some other are bitter but one thing for sure theyre all beautiful. its like watching through a kaleidoscope thats constantly stretching an old film strip without any missing scenes. going on a road trip to watch you perform with your old band, seeing the flush on your cheeks as i played the first song i made for you, getting drunk on new years eve and vomitting on my bed, telling each other stories as we sat on a grassfield, and so on. theyve become a part of me, a part of my entity my soul that i cant let go even if i want to. and thats the same thing as you. it hurts its sad it makes me want to tear myself apart smash my head on a brickwall scream till my throat bleeds if only it could change a thing but reality says otherwise it says i just have to live with it. people come and go, moments are constantly woven, some memories are forgotten and thats fine. thats just how it goes. you will always be a part of me and a piece of me will always follow your steps wherever you go. maybe one day our paths will cross again, maybe not. maybe we will live happily with our own life, maybe we will still remember each other once in a while. who knows. 20 years from now we would sit at the rooftop from different parts of the world and stare at the same 2am sky and think about how it would have been if everything were different. and in that moment maybe i could see your smile once again.

who knows.